Ok. Seriously folks. Is anyone else super tired of the “find your passion” and “follow your dream” crapola?! Does anyone else feel like a big fraud in life because you don’t have a “passion” (except for maybe tacos… people seem pretty pumped about tacos nowadays)? Is your job good enough, it pays the bills, it’s fine? Are you perfectly content with your life – going to work, spending time with loved ones, binging on a TV series, and maybe reading a good article or book from time to time? You don’t have a fire in your belly and you are ok with that – it sounds like indigestion and very uncomfortable, thank you very much. You’re GOOD!
FIND YOUR PASSION! but #SOBLESSED. Practice GRATITUDE, but BE BETTER. Be HAPPY but want MORE happiness while being HUMBLE. Be satisfied, but DREAM BIG!
Is TV too full of mean people for you? Are you sick of the sexual assaults, adultery, blurred ethical lines, death and destruction? Do you need some FEEL GOOD TV?
Do you ever need to RELAX and bond with your partner/family/roommates? I love to read, but I LOOOVE TV.
JW and I would like to share our FEEL GOOD FAVOURITES with YOU! Welcome to FEEL GOOD FRIDAYS!
Jane the Virgin
This is a book review of “Be Feel Think Do: A Memoir” by Anne Bérubé… and I desperately don’t want to insult her. Heck, Anne lives in my area! I think it’s AMAZING that she wrote this book and got published! SO COOL! This is the challenge of reviewing “self-help” books… some are a good fit for the reader… some are not. While Anne’s book was an interesting read and I was definitely moved, her approach to self-discovery just didn’t feel like a good fit for me.
Be Feel Think Do:
Be now with the soul in the body,
Feel now the soul through the body,
Let your soul and your body think,
Let your soul and your body do.
Anne Bérubé, Ph.D.
Wow. So. I kinda feel like bawling my eyes out after doing this exercise (How to write your own eulogy). Whew.
I do not need a list of accolades regarding my “successes” or “accomplishments” at my memorial. I do not need awards, rewards, medals due to being super duper awesome at something. I realized today, doing this little project, that all of the activities I’ve ever involved myself with – it was because I craved connection: community theater, running, traveling, fitness, parenting drop in groups, blogging. Each of these individual activities have never been my “passion” – because the PEOPLE were my passion.
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” Mark Twain
Who do you aspire to be? How would you like to be remembered when you die? How do you live your best life NOW?
I had a lovely Facebook experience recently. A friend wrote to me on my wall that she ran into a dog that reminded her of MY dog – therefore reminding her of ME. It was a nice note. Then a friend of hers, who was also an acquaintance of mine, responded to this little wall conversation stating “I know Amanda, she’s my old neighbor. Such a good person” Wow! Now THAT is how I want to be thought of… a good person. It just doesn’t get BETTER than that!
“I’m a good person, I hope. But I’m never as good as I want to be, never as nice as I want to be, never as generous as I want to be.” David Tennant (I’m a HUGE Doctor Who fan, FYI) 😛
In my current exploration of self, I’ve been looking for tools for my toolbox. Tools to help me figure out: My values, My priorities, My passions. This Facebook experience really got me thinking – If I were to die today, tomorrow, a couple of years from now or decades from now… What would I want said about me? My character? My deeds? My life’s work? How would I like to be remembered?
“Carl Jung teaches that water represents our emotions” –
Estelle Thomson, Painting Under the Sea, 21 Daily Creative Leaps
Waves push and pull… Do I want to be pushed to shore where it’s “safe”, or pulled out to sea – the big scary deep unknown?
Day 19 of the 21 Daily Creative Leaps is about boats… journeys… water… and emotions. Can I just say, I found it all very frustrating. From beginning to end. Isn’t THAT interesting, I thought? Why the heck am I so TENSE, I asked?
What a month… My August went by in a BLUR!!! How about you guys?
Aaaaaand… my August goals? Ya. Didn’t go so hot.
I did NOT run 3x a week. I did NOT cook 4x a week at home. I did NOT complete the 30 days of Yoga. I did NOT mindfully walk the dogs 1x per week.
But wait!!! What DID I do, you may ask? I supported my husband. Continue reading
As I read The Conscious Parent by Shefali Tsabary, PhD, I reflected as a clinical social worker/family therapist, as a daughter, as a wife, as a step-mother, and as a mother… my roles and my close relationships.
In the past when I have done family therapy, the main objective was never to “fix” the child. Most times, the whole family was hurting and the parents needed to heal before the child could then themselves heal. Advocating for this personal work on the part of the parents was the hardest part of my job. Looking at ourselves… our own triggers… our own wounds from the past and how they may be affecting our current relationships… that’s hard haaaaard hard work. Parents of children who are acting out and struggling would rather a step-by-step guide in how to “handle” their child and support from a therapist while executing the steps, versus look at themselves. That was NOT what I did as a family therapist… and that is NOT what this book is about. There are no quick fixes in this book. There are no techniques. It is not a how-to manual of parenting. Continue reading
Whoa! I’ve been blogging for over a month. Whaaaaat? That went FAST!
This also means I’ve been #goaldigging hardcore since the end of June. So! To give myself credit for the hard work I’ve been doing, to keep myself accountable for what I could be doing better, and to stay motivated – let’s review! Continue reading
“No truly happy person feels the need to stand in front of the mirror and recite that she’s happy. She just is.” Mark Manson, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Ok. Ok. This may not be toootally fair. Many people need to start a journey of self-acceptance with some intentional hard work – but eventually, we have to let go of what we are lacking and just live! Moving on from trauma by draping oneself in the persona of a survivor may not be truly healing. Embracing your body in all it’s grandeur by telling the world on a daily basis you love yourself despite your fat, cellulite, stretch marks… it just doesn’t sound that accepting. I like how Mark said that our search for money, health, happiness, self-acceptance can laser in on what we feel we are lacking, highlight it, spotlight it so that we continue to see what we are LACKING vs what we are striving for… Continue reading